


The floor is lava

by DontDiePls28



Series: whats CRACK-alackin bro? (or, crack fics and im a loser) [1]
Category: Be More Chill - Iconis/Tracz
Genre: Crack Fic, F/F, I know it's trash, It's Not Paranoia If They're Really Out To Get You, Jake Has Pink Nails™, Joke Fic, M/M, PLS don't hate on me, Read at Your Own Risk, first fic, pray to Mike Faist for he is an angel, really short, srry, the floor is lava, this was going to be a boyf riends but it evolved into a richjake, why did I write this
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-17
Updated: 2018-02-13
Packaged: 2019-03-06 03:54:19
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 12
Words: 1,388
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13402920
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DontDiePls28/pseuds/DontDiePls28
Summary: Jake yells that the floor is lava,  and crazyness ensues.I'm sorry.





	1. The Floor Is Lava

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Tyler22](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tyler22/gifts).



> I was reading bmc fan fiction, and suddenly inspiration for this trash. I'm sorry if you read this.

> "THE FLOOR IS LAVA!!!" Jake yelled,  and picked Rich up bridal style. He jumped on to the couch. "I'M BREAKING UP WITH YOU JEREMY, SORRY!" Christine yelled. She grabbed Jenna and kissed her, Jenna kissed back. "NOOO! MY GIRLFRIEND BROKE UP WITH ME AND WILL DIE IN THE LAVA!" Jeremy cried sadly. "AND NOW I WILL TOO!" Michael grabbed Jeremy and floated to the ceiling. "UR MY FAVWITE PERSON!" Michael yelled,  and Jeremy was so touched that they started making out.  Brooke and Chloe left the house and went on a date instead. 


	2. Pattycake

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jenna starts to work on her OTP
> 
> Also, I'm srry for creating the sequel literally no one asked for.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> im srry. again.

A few months after the floor is lava incident, Jeremy and Michael were officially dating, and so was Jenna and Christine, and Chloe and Brooke. the whole squip squad was over one day, and all the couples started making out, leaving Rich and Jake to have an awkward conversation. "Scale of one to ten, how much of a bi furry is jeremy?" Jake asked bored. "i'd say nine." Rich replied. They eventually got bored of questions like that, and started playing patty cake.

 

Suddenly Christine threw an empty water bottle at Jake. "MAKE OUT WITH EACH OTHER ALREADY!!" at which both Jake and Rich blushed and fumbled away from each other. Jenna started a group chat on her phone.

 

**gossip gal added jeremy's here, GAYmer, theater buff, pink, and berry to the chat.**

**gossip gal changed the chat name to GET THE GAYS TOGETHER**

**GAYmer- but we already are?**

**gossip gal- no, not you two! rich and jake!**

**berry- we're literally in the same room wth**

**gossip gal- shut up brooke.**

**pink- don't talk to my gf like that!**

**theater buff- lol**

**jeremy's here- lol**

**gossip gal- no, but srsly, we need to get them together.**

**GAYmer- ok**

**berry- ok**

**pink- ok**

**jeremy's here- ok**

**theater buff- stop spamming me, but ok.**

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)


	3. Wth

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I don't even know, save yourself pls.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> again, no one asked for this.

“Who are you texting?” Rich asked, suddenly being right behind Jeremy. Jeremy threw his phone across the room. “NOTHING! NO ONE! W-WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT!!?!??!?!?” Jeremy shouted smoothly. 

 

Jake picked up Jeremy’s phone. It was cracked, but Jeremy had forgotten to turn it off, so Jake read the texts. “Wth” Jake said confused. He turned it off and handed it back to Jeremy. Jake picked rich up bridal style and walked out the door.

 

“Wth Jeremy?” Jenna asked. “Now Jake knows our plans.” “at least it wasn’t the group chat where we’re planning world domination!” Christine said optimistically. Jenna looked at Christine lovingly. “yeah.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry


	4. yas homo lol

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> wat the title sais.

“They want to set us up.” Jake said to Rich. “oh. haha. Funny…” Rich said uncomfortably. “Yeah, i mean, why would someone like you want to date me?” Jake said, suddenly being a self conscious potato. “Wat? Dude, you are hot, and you have a great personality, and i mean that in the friend zoniest way possible.” 

 

Jake stared at him in awe, and kissed him on the lips. “No homo.” “yeah, lol, no homo.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” “lol.” 

 

“STOP THE NO HOMO!!!!!” Chloe yelled suddenly right behind them. “YAS HOMO!!” Brooke declared, suddenly in front of them.


	5. wth rich

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> they become kidnappers.

Christine Michael and Jeremy kidnapped Rich, and Chloe Brooke and Jenna kidnapped Jake. 

 

“Isn't this illegal?” Jeremy asked. “Not if it’s for true love!!” Christine responded. “Riiiiiiiiiight.” Jeremy said, still not convinced. “Shut up you two, he’s right heere.” Michael said.  “did you say heere, or here, because i told you to stop using my last name wrong.” “I totally said here, not heere.” “ok, sure.” “guys, wth.” “shut up Rich, we’re trying to work this out.” “we  _ should _ be shipping him with Jake rn though.” “oh right.” “sorry” 

 

They all looked at Rich, turning to him in unison. 


	6. wth jake

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> pt 2 of the last thing.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> srry that i didn't post yesterday. here's 2 posts to make up for it.

Christine Michael and Jeremy kidnapped Rich, and Chloe Brooke and Jenna kidnapped Jake.

 

“Sorry we interrupted you two, but you both need to get together because we all ship it.” Jenna said. “wut?” Jake said confuzzled. “C’mon, its obvious that you two like each other.” Chloe said. “Yeah!” Brooke agreed. “I have no idea what you're talking about. Rich may be bi, but that doesn't mean that he likes me like that.” Jake tried to convince them.

 

“He’s in denial.” Chloe stated. “It’s so sad.” Brooke added. “the poor boi.” Jenna stated.


	7. fess up already.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> jeremy and michael might be having relationship issues? idk. we'll see later.

“C’mon Rich, it’s been 5 minutes already, just admit you're love, and we’ll get you two together!” Christine stated, honestly not understanding what made this so difficult for him. 

 

“For the last time, i do  _ not  _ like him like that! And even if i  _ did _ , he’d never feel the same way, so why bother?”  Rich stated sadly.

 

“just confess and you can get on to the gay love fest. That's how it worked for me and jeremy heere here!” “pls dont say it like that, just ‘jeremy here’ or ‘jeremy heere’ would have been ok!” “i know!” jeremy sighed in exasperation as a response, and started coughing on his sigh, and choking on his cough, michael did CPR, and they started making out again.

 

“aww! You two are so cute together. See Rich,  _ you _ could be this cute to if you fess up.” christine stated proudly, as if she was the reason they got together, which she sorta was, but that’s beside the point.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i'm really taking my time with this. huh. srry.


	8. rich confesses.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> the tittle explains it.

 

After another hour of trying to get him to confess, Rich finally snapped. “YOU KNOW WHAT!?!?” he yelled. “I DO LIKE JAKE LIKE THAT, BUT THERE'S NO *(freaking)* WAY IN HELL THAT HE *(freaking)* LIKES ME BACK!” he paused becoming sad. “He’s probably strait anyways.” 

 

Christine laughed. “Oh trust me, he is  _ not _ straight.” Rich and Jeremy gave her puzzled looks, and Michael laughed, remembering the particular occasion that she was also recollecting and wth is this wording?

 

“What do you mean?” Rich said still confused. She giggled. “By the way,” Michael said, “we were recording you, and the others are recording Jake. we’re gonna show you Jakes confession, and Jake will see yours!” Michael concluded happily. Rich looked mortified. “Well, bye Rich!” and they left, and Rich left soon after. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so im finally done with rich's kidnap scenes, now its jakes turn. also, srry for my weird censoring. almost forgot, what do you guys think christine was talking about with jake not being strait? honestly, i love you guys. im weird. =) (I cAnT sPeLlLlLl!)


	9. pink nails

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> jake confesses

 

“C’mon!” Brooke whined for the 63rd time. (Jake counted) “im not letting you paint my nails, and painting my nails will  _ not _ encourage me to confess that i’m in love with Rich.” 

 

“so you admit it!” Chloe cried happily. 

“Duh. i don’t think that i could have made it more obvious.” Jake said unfazed. 

 

Jenna looked triumphant, and Brooke pouted. “Can we still paint ur nails?” 

Jake sighed. “Fine, just don't paint them pink.” 

 

Jake would have pink nails for two weeks after that.

 


	10. RICH IS A WEEB PASS IT ON

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> rlly short chapter. i suk. srry.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> im sorry for not updating consistantly, i havent had as much motivation as of late, and i will get to uploading soon.

Rich and Jake were hanging out by themselves. “I like your nails.” Rich said honestly. Jake blushed. “Thanks. Brooke did them.” 

Rich nodded. They sat in silence for a bit, and then they both got a text from Jenna. It was two videos, one for jake, and one for rich. They got out their headphones, (Rich had some really girly looking anime headphones) and listened.


	11. 11 chapters already? wow. thats cool. here, have another way to short chapter.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Video summary's cos i suk at this.

 

Rich’s video summary : Jake getting his nails painted and talking about how hot Rich is and how much he wants to make out with him and feel his body and ima stop typing this now.

 

Jake’s video summary : you read [that chapter](https://archiveofourown.org/works/13402920/chapters/30925467) right? Ok, good. 

 

Rich’s whole face was red. He grabbed Jake’s face and they started making out

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Jake prolly got rlly lewd.


	12. the end.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> srry

All of the ships in their friend group were now dating, and Jake kept getting his nails painted. 

Sorry for the anti climatic ending. 

Their may be a sequel. 

 

idk.


End file.
